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| Hello,
I've been having a look round the forums seems a good site! I just want a little advice; basically I have always been a worrier. I had a mild social anxiety when I was younger which I overcame. This last year has been truly awful for me, a year ago I was feel low, stressed and not overly happy. Then an event took place which I just can't put behind me, I worry all the time about it and fear things happening again. I am over the worst of my depression/anxiety but I'm still not calm and happy.
I just want to love life again, I feel so selfish feeling sorry for myself and ungrateful for the gift of life. I want to accept what's happened in the past and be a stronger person to deal with situation in my future.
I do have bouts when I feel great and could take on the world, but my fears and anxieties always catch up on me.
Can meditation help me be happy again? I have been going some mindfulness and positive visualisation. I'm about to read "Full Catastrophe Living by Jon Kabat-Zinn" anyone read it?
Sorry for the long post
Thanks for an advice x
Edited by lostinlife 2007-11-09 12:38 PM
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| If you have started one practice, do it for a sufficient time. And, do not read other things.
BTW: That was an advice! |
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| I just know the mindfulness from what I have read off the internet, I don't really have any sort of guide for what I am meant to be doing. There is so much out there, telling you what to do, so your right in in saying not to read it. I might give it a go though I have only just started with meditation, i still really don't know what I'm doing. |
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Expert Yogi
Posts: 8442
    
| Hi Paul - sorry to hear about your difficult year. Do you have a meditation teacher? It is really a good idea especially for those who are feeling a little lost to have a guide. A good asana practice is also helpful. I have read parts of Full Catastrophe and seen JKZ speak on TV. I think he has a very good program and also works in a very commonsense, and clear way. I had a friend years ago who, when the going got rough, would always say, "and this too, shall pass." The only constant in life is change. It will not stay this way forever. Do find more help if you need it. Reach out - people are there to help. Keep in touch and let us know how things are going. We really do care about what happens to people! |
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| Hi Tourist,
Thanks for the reply it was really nice. I don't have a teacher; I don't know how to find one. I know there is a meditation centre near where I live that runs a 5 week course everyone now and then. The next one starts this week but I'm off to Thailand for the next 3 weeks. I'll just go see to local Buddhists! So I won't be able to go to a class till the New Year, I'd rathe rhave a 1 on 1 teacher who I can ask questions get advice than a group one.
I have so many positive things in my life, great friends, an ok job, I'm healthy, i still live at home so have little money worries. I should be enjoying life! But I'm almost obsessed with all the bad things in my life.
I'm determined to overcome my issues!
When I'm down I have trouble eating, I'm just never hungry; when I meditate I become hungry and able to eat!
I just feel there has to be more to it than sitting for half an hr a day and focus on your breathing, is it really that simple once you get the hang of it?
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| lotinlife: send me email. |
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Expert Yogi
Posts: 8442
| Paul - yes, it really can be that simple.  Of course, it can be much more complex as well, and having a one on one teacher will give you someone to talk to and ask all the questions that come up during that daily half hour. When you get back from your holiday, check at your local center and see if they do one on one or sign up for the class. And keep counting your blessings as you have in your last post. That is a powerful practice, as well. Don't despair and do keep reaching out. Have a nice holiday! |
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| Thanks again, I'm gonna keep up with my mindfulness, I feel I could do longer than 30 min, i set my alarm to go off after 30 min with a very gentle song so I know when to stop. I do feel I could do longer to be honest so I think I may extend my practace! I do feel alot better after I meditate, I'm told it takes months but I notice st8 away and for the rest of the day I feel a little calmer and a bit more positive. I'm still a long way off the happy fun loving person I used to be but I'm sure I'll get there in the end!
I will keep you updated how I get on
Thanks again you have been really kind
x |
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Expert Yogi
Posts: 8442
| I am not an expert at all, but it would probably be more helpful to do 2 sessions per day of 20 - 30 min than trying to extend one session. I hope others will contribute to this if I am not right. |
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| Hi Paul, I haven't read that particular book, but I have read other writing by Jon Kabat-Zinn. He gives good advice and writes in a way that is easy to learn from. I'm with Tourist that two shorter sessions a day would probably be better. You should also pat yourself on the back for getting through a tough time, and not becoming bitter. Your open to changing yourself for the better, and even that frame of mind is an accomplishment. Don't get discouraged when you find yourself caught up in your old thinking, your mind has well worn pathways and is used to going that way. Just remind yourself that's old thinking, and remind yourself of the new ideas your trying to instill. The actual ideas behind so many meditation techniques are easy, but putting them into practice and sticking with it is the harder part. So for encouragement, Don't get discouraged if you find yourself in the old thinking, Don't get discouraged if you miss a time you set aside for practice, Don't feel guilty about shortening a meditation session. Do pat yourself on the back when you take time to take care of yourself, Do recognize that your improved state of mind is from the work your doing in meditation, Do enjoy life, Shelly |
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| Thanks for the replies, they've been really helpful, I'm off on my holiday tomorrow! I'll try meditate as much as I can while I'm away, and I'll be in touch when I get back! I'm looking forward to being my old self again, no matter how long it takes!
Thanks again
Paul |
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| Hi there,
I was once like that back in late 90s, until I took a meditation class. I realized that we are part of the Source, The Beginning of Everything. There is no reason not to be happy and not to love our life. We are fully blessed with Pure Unconditional Love - if we choose to accept it. Always remember that you and the Source is an unbeatable team.
Yes, meditation can help, and beyond. Meditation is one technique where you can practice to be better connected with The Source. 
regards,
alex |
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| Lost,
once you realize something is lost then it can be found. when and alchoholic realizes his/her addiction, then the real road to recovery can begin. Reading your post I relate on many levels, but as no two snowflakes are exactly alike, I do not know exactly what you are going through. you may try this if you wish. Ask yourself the question, why worry, the answer that comes up from that question ask it how will it help. for example
why worry about bills
cause I may loose my house if I dont
so how do I stop from loosing my house
get a job
so how do I get a job
go apply
what happens if I apply and dont get a job,
keep applying and if I loose my house
deal with it when it happens
what can I do today to assist my situation
take action
why not sit here and worry all day
because action needs to be taken
what worry
I dont know, I need to focus on finding a job today
so I ask, Why worry
good luck lost, I have faith you will be found |
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| Hi Paul
Can meditation make you happy? NO!
You are already happy, all that meditation does is remove the metal blocks to your core being.
Meditation is just a process off acceptance, of opening your self to your fears.
And it does start as simply as your breath awareness technique.
As you get deeper into your practises you relax deeper letting go of deeper rooted mental patterns.
As you seem to find it easy to sit in meditation don't time your self and don't stop your self, if you have the time?
The longer the practice the deeper the awareness will go, as long as your not pushing your self or are uncofortable at all.
It's very hard getting any guidance on meditation as it's so personal so don't worry if you find it hard to find teachers.
The best thing to do, if you can, is do your practice in as pure natural nature as possible.
The vibrational field is naturally meditative.
As it sounds your trip to Thailand is the best start, thousands of Buddhists monks can't be wrong?
Hope this helps?
Phil  |
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Will it help
