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| Does anyone else ever have the feeling that you are simply flopping from one pose to the next? I swear, no matter what I'm practicing (Hatha, Iyengar, Ashtanga) I feel like a bull in a china shop. I know that if I really moved like that, my teachers would be on me like white on rice, but lately I feel so lacking in the ease and grace of the flow of my classes.
Granted, I'm probably the newest Ashtangi in my Modified Primary class which is also attended by several teachers -i know, I'm not supposed to be watching, but when the guy next to me does 10 perfect drop backs while I struggle through 3 post back injury modified bridge poses, it's a little difficult to swallow. No, I was never able to do a dropback in the first place. ..
I've had a neck/shoulder problem for a year or so and I've just started seeing a chiropractor... which coincided w/ a lower back injury... so I've had to back way off... the balance issues I was experiencing from the neck/s houlder problem are now exacerbated (IMO) by the chiro treatements. The backing way off due to the back injury has resulted in a decrease in my strength ( esp upper body),and stamina, as well as an inability to get into shoulderstand (not to mention the mountain of blankets I'm supposed to use isn't really helping either) so I'm doing it w/ my feet on the wall... wich leaves me completely off balance.
My Iyengar and Hatha teachers know each other and constantly congratulate me on my "obvious Iyengar foundation" - which I'm very grateful for as I believe it's prevented me from additional/ further injuries. However, I don't feel like I'm progressing... I know Guruji says "practice and all will come"... but I'd like it all to come a little sooner than it is IYKWIM...
I'm planning to take an anusara class Wed, then the 4 day David Williams workshop this weekend. Hope I can feel better by then!
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| I know what you mean. I'm an instructor, and sometimes I feel especially ungraceful when I have to demonstrate something in front of one of my classes, sort of like a hippo doing ballet. Poses I normally do beautifully practicing by myself, I sometimes do sloppily because I get nervous when I know I'm being watched.
I can also relate to the limited physical ability thing due to injury. I have a low back injury from an instructor who pushed onto my legs too hard while in pavanamuktasana/wind relieving posture (the complete story is in YogaDancer's "Everyone's got a spot...?" thread if you want to take a look at it). I used to the Bikram variation of ardha chandrasana (standing backbend) beautifully, and backbended like tomorrow, now I can hardly bend back enough to barely see the wall behind me. Heck, I can barely bend my back period!
I know that we're all told to let go of our egos and honour where you are in a practice, but when you're in a class and you've got Mr. Olympic Gymnast on one side and Ms. Cirque du Soleil on the other, it's kinda hard to not compare yourself to the people next to you and get frustrated. When I find myself doing that, I simply tell my brain that I will get there with time as long as I am patient and that my body is beautiful for what it can already do, and usually it helps.
So don't feel bad if you're feeling frustrated, it happens to EVERYONE.
Edited by itchytummy 2004-11-07 11:04 PM
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| Yeah, I think frustration is normal. But I've shifted my attitude more towards the direction of being inspired by others rather than frustrated by comparisons. Especially if you talk to someone that appears to have achieved mastery in their practice(whatever that practice may be) you find that for the most part there has been a story there, a struggle and effort to it. Rarely does something come free, cheap, easy... It's kinda hard not to admire and be inspired by someone that has achieved that sort of mastery. So for me, it's like I tell myself, "ohh..one day I can get there too with enough effort if I really want to!"
And truly, it's not fair to yourself to compare yourself to anyone else anyways. No two people are going to have followed the same path, have the same hurdles, limitations, expectations, histories... Everyone is unique. Only You can be where you are right now. So if you choose to compare yourself to anyone, make it a fair comparison with yourself. And as long as you are progressing, even if only in invisible ways, then you're on the right path.
Take myself for example, I've made huge advancements. Does it show at all in my physical asanas? Not in the slightest little bit. But I'm still very proud of myself for the work I've accomplished. Well...maybe it does show some, I'm not clenching my teeth as much anymore. 
The point being, it's understandable to be frustrated, but just be gentle with yourself. And maybe some shifts in perspective may help more in the long run than perfecting any pose anyways.
Be Well |
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| Thanks for your supportive responses! I really appreciate it... in my Ashtanga class, the instructor studied classical ballet for many years, one of the teacher/ students studied classical dance for 5+ years, another teacher/ student.. well, he's just not human... and I have to remember that q) I studied ballet for 3 years when I was 6 b) I've only done yoga (so far) for fun and c) I'm stiff as a board! |
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| Yep, that's normal, but that doesn't mean that you should be content with your frustration.
Nothing of value is achieved without some degree of difficulty and sacrifice. The challenge of yoga is not always physical often it is emotional and mental. Your desire to be "good at yoga" and "graceful" is totally understandable. However, you have to struggle with your desire to look like other people and perform like them and you have to struggle with your own sense of self.
Switching from hatha to iyengar to ashtanga to anusara is nice and will give you a broad base of knowledge, but the true breakthroughs will come when you put your head down and practice religiously and persistently at one thing for a period of time (months to years).
I'm not trying to criticise. You are obviously very dedicated and persistant. However, the best way to improve your self image and sense of pride is to undertake a difficult task and try to complete it to the best of your abilities.
Set your goal high. Then take the steps to achieve it. If you fall short, it is not a crime and you will have climbed higher than had you not set out on the journey at all.
Good luck and bon voyage.
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| Gruvemom - 2004-11-08 1:31 PM
Thanks for your supportive responses! I really appreciate it... in my Ashtanga class, the instructor studied classical ballet for many years, one of the teacher/ students studied classical dance for 5+ years, another teacher/ student.. well, he's just not human... and I have to remember that q ) I studied ballet for 3 years when I was 6 b ) I've only done yoga (so far ) for fun and c ) I'm stiff as a board!
Hahaha! No wonder you feel like a bull in a china shop. I would too. The way to get over this is simple: go back in time to the age of 5 and start ballet and gymnastics. Then instead of going to college run off to India to study with Patabhi Jois for 4 years. From there join Cirque de Soleil. Come back to your yoga class and try again. Seriously, be thankful for all the good things in your life: husband, kids, house, dog...whatever. You don't have the benefit of seeing what these people looked like before they started ballet and dance. You don't get to see how clumsy they were before and how stiff they were. You didn't get to watch them practice two to four hours a day for years. You only see the result of all those years of practice and hardwork.
A year from now, some poor woman will come into class and look at you and say, "gosh, I wish I was as flexible and graceful as you. I'll never be able to do this." Then you will understand and you will be able to sympathize. |
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| the true breakthroughs will come when you put your head down and practice religiously and persistently at one thing for a period of time (months to years).
Thanks for that, YogaGuy! I know it looks like I'm a yoga beebee in a boxcar, but I'm not currently flitting between all those styles  I dropped my Iyengar class due to proximity and the cost of gas - not to mention that dd has a lot of school days off during this next session - and I only took the Anusara class
b/c I had an open night and my chiro has been nudging me to come to his class for weeks.
So really, it's Hatha Mondays, Ashtanga or Power Teus/Thurs, Ashtanga Sats. I'm not picking up Anusara as a regular practice b/c the classes are too $$ and not within my schedule. Plus, based on last night, it's too sweaty, there's too much touching and there's partner work . ugh...not my style at all
As for the woman who comes into class and "aspires" to do as "well" as I... I simply tell them flat out that I was 4 sizes larger a year ago and that if I've gone from where I was to where I am, they can too.
melissa 
Edited by Gruvemom 2004-11-11 12:51 PM
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| My unqualified advice -
Practice within yourself, eyes closed when possible.
Keep your mind on your breath first.
Look for a "zone" where its just you and the instructor's voice.
Remember yoga is about personal limits wherever you find them.
Randy
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| Gruvemom - 2004-11-11 12:49 PM
As for the woman who comes into class and "aspires" to do as "well" as I... I simply tell them flat out that I was 4 sizes larger a year ago and that if I've gone from where I was to where I am, they can too.
melissa
Well done, Gruvemom! Sounds like you are walking the path. |
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| Sounds like you are walking the path.
I hope it ends at Bergdorfs! |
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| And that at the end of that path there's someone to pay the Bergdorf's bill! |
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Gruvemom,
| the balance issues I was experiencing from the neck/s houlder problem are now exacerbated (IMO) by the chiro treatements. The backing way off due to the back injury has resulted in a decrease in my strength ( esp upper body),and stamina,|
Do you have a cervical disc problem? Just curious.
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| Flipcat, I have probs w/ my c5 and L5. The C5 seems to be genetic (if family history serves) and it's my biggest prob by far b/c it interferes w/ my right neck/shoulder and arm including the musculature.
my L5 I think I created by not doing a backbend properly, but it's come along - and so have my backbends (though my knees are a bit wider than the shoulders, I admit) |
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Frustratiion
