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| Just wondered about peoples' thoughts - especially teachers - on the above. In my Bikram class a new girl started about a month ago. She seems to be either high school or college age and has lost quite a bit of weight in that time and is looking very thin and quite pale. Now there may well be other explanations and I have never actually spoken with her, but has this come up for other people? What do teachers do if they notice something like that? Bikram attracts people trying to lose weight, but consequently they may not always be there for the healthiest of reasons. I would never feel comfortable saying anything to her, but if it continues should I talk to the teacher? Mind my own business?
Maria |
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| Although I doubt your assessment is off base, it's wrong to assume an eating disorder just because someone is overly thin. Just like it's wrong to assume someone is gay because their either oddly feminine or oddly masculine. She might have cancer or thyroid issues.
That said, what is important is that you care enough to think about it. My suggestion would be to place your mat next to hers and indulge in a little chit chat. Everyone can use a friend, even if it's just someone in class once or twice a week. You could even ask her (at some point) if she's feeling well, given the (probable) circles under her eyes or other symptoms of whatever is going on develop.
This is an extreme, extreme thing to say, but I'm putting it out there: You never know in this world, when a minute's conversation with a stranger can send someone in a better direction. Suicides have been averted by a moment's kindness, a good word, or an off-hand compliment. So before you do stick your nose in (which is honestly what it would be) get to know her a little? She might even be glad to have a buddy; teenagers can be so shy.
And plus, just because someone is teaching yoga doesn't mean they're qualified or even sensitive enough to broach this type of topic with a student. That could be enough to scare her off class! People with eating disorders are clever, and if they feel someone's onto them they'll avoid that person. Control is everything. Trust me, dah'link. I know.
So make a friend? and thank you for caring.
Christine |
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| My opinion would be to just ask her if everything is ok. I have also struggled with anorexia, and am healthy now, but in hindsight I am surprised that no one really asked me that. I was not ok, so I may have appreciated someone just asking. I think yoga is more about being in tune with your body, so it wouldn't seem like such an "out there" question. I used to take an aerobics class every week, with the same people, and no one commented on how unhealthy looking I became. I would expect that my yoga teachers now would say something, because we focus so much on our bodies, and how they are changing. I wish I was doing yoga back then, so I might not have gone through that dark period of my life.
It is great that you have observed that this girl is struggling, but now you should be a friend and open it up for discussion. Don't say anything that would make her self concious about her body, but more about her needing someone to talk to. They really make a point in our classes to tell people that they need to let the teachers know if you have any health problems, so if it is a health problem, she should have told you anyway. You are just taking an interest - as you should. |
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| Rail thin, very pale young girl in my Bikram gang. I got to know her a bit and jokingly asked her to lunch and told her I'd get some red meat down her--woo Hoo was she ticked at me. Gist of my chew out was "Everybody pukes on skinny girls--think we're sick." However, I just apologised profusely and told her I was just checking. We've become good friends since and I can barely afford to feed her lunch anymore as she can PACK it away. Moral of the story, she's a high metabolism type, naturally pale. But even though I pushed a button at the start--we're buds so we all win. |
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| Yeah there are those lucky types that eat whatever and stay as skinny (my bro is one of those!). But, Maria said that she has noticed that the girl has lost a substantial amount of weight since starting yoga a month ago. Since there is such a big change in her appearance, she should be concerned. Again, don't say anything that may alarm the girl, and make her think that you are "watching" her. For some reason I don't mind talking about personal parts of my body with my teachers. Heck, they see it all in class, my butt from every angle. I can't really hide anything from them! |
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| Thanks for the advice. I take classes at different times and only see her about once or twice a week. My schedule was tight in the past week and 1/2 and I did some practicing at home so haven't seen her in that time, which was why I was surprised. When I was her age I had friends with food issues - bulimia and anorexia - it's the age group that really struggles the most with it. The signs are there - dark circles under the eyes, wears baggy clothes though she is so thin. But as YogaDancer says it could be something else and I don't want to jump in prematurely. I will try to start a casual conversation and see how she responds. The difficulty is she usually comes in right at the start of class and leaves without the final savasana. My thought was if I mention something to the instructor if she continues to lose this way, she could approach her away from the group. I'll see how it goes.
Maria |
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| I lost 20 pounds my first month of Bikram yoga and was below healthy. The teachers told me to back off in class, not because I was too skinny but because I was way too intense for even a very intense bikram studio. I regained some weight after this. Is she struggling alot in class? In yoga training I was close to going to the hospital after the first week. I always stayed away from salts because of my mom told me so. Well my electrolytes were down to very dangerous levels and I looked like a holocust victim with black circles around my eyes. I started to puke all over the place outside and it was getting scary. Some one gave me gatorade and as a chugged it I had a full body orgasim immediatly. I drank a whole 64 oz of it in a minute and felt great, from death to full life in five minutes. A extreme electrolyte imbalance will make you look thin becuase the muscles loose tone. So maybe it is this. Does she sweat alot in class? I would sweat five pounds a class for my first four years. I have been suprised that I sweat like a normal person now. The middle of the towel is wet and that is it. It use to be two beach towels with a puddle and it would spill onto the floor. I would not force a friendship, start slow. If she starts to get black circles around the eyes then bring up electrolytes. This is within the professional boudaries of Bikram yoga, since it can be a major issue. If this is her first month, alot of changes can happen in the body like happened to me. The toxins that are being release can cause someone to look pale in the beginning. |
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| Yes, this is a healthy method of yoga. And yes, definitely for beginners. Uh-huh.
Geeezeeee... |
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| I was attracted to Bikram yoga because I am a extremist. I never went into anything half way. Bikram yoga matched me. It is very easy to look at Bikram yoga and see it as unhealthy once you have developed. And see all its imbalances. Would I do it again, No. Am I grateful for the experience, Very. It is easy to say this after I went through it. Our society is intense and imbalanced. Yoga reflects life and life reflects yoga. Bikram can bring these extreme elements to the fore front to be processed. Now the big question, does Bikram Yoga make space for them to be transended? Or just made a habit in class. I did and I think others can transend. If the density of mind is great, then it will never respect or acknowledge the subtile energies. The challenges of Bikram yoga are great for a dense mind or unsensitive mind and it will break down in the process, surrendering into the deeper more subtile energies. It would be great if we can just wip away the lower energies in ourself and society, but it is these lower energies that develop the structure for the higher centers to be explored. Like pluralistic people who would like to see the end of war and the corporate structure, but they do not relize they get to think this way because of the benifits of these structures. I am implying a integral understanding that respects the lower energies and strivies to get them balanced not get rid of them. Nothing is implicitly wrong with Bikram yoga series, it is the method of teaching it that, to me, looks imbalanced. Nothing is perfect in the manafested realm. The goal for me as a teacher is to get it so people do not hurt themselves and get timely adjustments when they are ready to transend. Development is a slow process.  |
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Anorexia
